Don’t Over-Think, Just Remember Who You Are

Getting any woman to stop thinking would be a miracle in itself because that’s what women do and we do it well. We are natural problem solvers and like to analyse everything in life until we get a good grasp of it and if we are honest, we probably do the same thing to the men in our lives. The problems occur when we start over-thinking every little comment that they say and everything that they do and gradually he starts to become the main focus in your life. Worse, you even begin thinking about what happens if you mess things up.

Over-thinking is not an unusual occurrence; it can happen very easily if you start to like someone a lot. All you can think about is whether he might be thinking about you too, wondering if he misses you a little and hoping that he is longing to see you again too. You can’t resist telling your friends about him and you just want to keep talking about him and how wonderful he is because he is special. It might not feel wrong to do this, but there are some important things that you need to know.

When you become so emotionally involved with your new man, you tend to lose energy for those other important things in your life. You know the day to day things that have up until now kept you going. These over-whelming and often intense feelings can often diminish the attractive qualities that he first saw in you. Plus, you start worrying about how you will feel if this relationship doesn’t work out, and this fear can quickly eat away at you, dragging you down so instead of being an independent and carefree woman, you become insular and needy.

So it may be very early days in your relationship and even though you feel that you have found the one, the man who is going to change your life going forward, do not stop being the person that he found so attractive.  You need to carry on going out, living your life, enjoying it to the full. You can still meet up with other men, you don’t need to sleep with anyone if you are concerned that it seems unfair, but you still have to live and to not put your life on hold simply because you have met someone who potentially may become important.

If fear makes you needy, you need to change your mindset quite quickly. Instead of worrying about what might go wrong, you should be making sure that he sees you as someone special and for him to be worried that he might lose you. This isn’t playing power games by the way; this is just ensuring that he sees your worth from the start. Too often men amble through life accepting that they are dating or married without really giving their full attention to their partner. They kind of expect the woman to be fully committed and loving and caring as if it’s part of the female job description. Men rarely dedicate all of their time to their partner, so why do you want to give up all that you have worked for up to now?

Often it can be as simple as a little low self-esteem on your part and you can correct this fairly easily by remembering what a catch you are. When you are dating, and some of your relationships inevitably fail over the years, it’s hard to stay resolute and strong and for it not to impact your self-esteem, but you need to go back to basics and give your ego a little boost if you find yourself dedicating every waking hour and thought to your new man.

For any relationship to work, it’s important to not over-think things and to just take life as it comes. Just remember that he was attracted to the woman who had a full life prior to him and whilst you can make room for him in your life, you still have to retain some of your own passions in life too.

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