Dating is unique to all of us. As much as there are guidelines
or principles in this case, dating is very much an individual experience and therefore
personal to you. The principles of course do help you to make the best out of
your dating experience and therefore, it’s of benefit to ensure that you follow
these guidelines.
Internet dating affords you a great many possibilities in
that it can instantly widen your social circle and enables you to meet people
that would normally not be within your remit. In the first instance, Internet
dating helps you to get to know people from the safety of your own home. You
don’t have to go and meet anyone if you don’t want to, and you certainly should
only go and meet someone if it feels right to do so.
Bear in mind though that a virtual world can be a
compelling one. It can be exciting to exist solely in the realms of emails or
online chat. There is certainly less pressure to perform as there would be if
you met face to face although there are options for chatting via webcam if you
choose to do so. Some people do hide behind a virtual world and they just do
not wish to take the next step and meet up, this is fine if you are happy to
have an online pen friend only but if they continue to not meet up, and you
start to find this frustrating, then it may be wise to accept that this
‘friendship’ already has limitations.
If you’re shy of course, a virtual world has great
advantages but at some point you are going to want to get to know who you are
talking to properly. When it comes to meeting up, you may well be nervous,
that’s understandable but don’t worry, just make sure you have plenty of
questions to ask (without making it sound like an interrogation) and a few
funny stories of your own. Keep a first date as enjoyable and relaxed as
possible. You don’t need to pour out your heart and soul then and there;
hopefully you will have better opportunities to talk about your life at a later
date.
Honesty is so important. Sadly, the Internet dating scene
is full of dishonest people but don’t’ fall into that trap where you think you
could be anybody and project an image that is false. If you did eventually meet
up, you will have a lot of explaining to do. Never make out you are someone
that you are not, it’s not worth it and dishonesty simply breeds contempt.
When you start going out on dates, try to have a clear
picture of what you want to achieve. Do remember though that if you have false
hopes, you are just going to go home disappointed. This is akin to setting
yourself up for failure before you have even got going properly. Always meet somewhere public and of course
where you feel comfortable. Make sure you have seen an excellent and recent photo
of your date too so that they are easily recognisable. The last thing you want
to do is to have to trawl up and down the bar asking if any of them are your
date.
Even if you feel love struck on your first date, take it
slowly. Don’t assume your date has been struck by cupid’s arrow too. Hold on to
all of the lovely feelings you have and make it your rule to take it slow and
really get to know someone before any big declarations of love. You might be
naturally intense and want to move your date on to the next level but just let
fate take a hand and enjoy it for what it is and not for what it might become.
As you gradually get to know your date, you may well find
that your first instinct was right and that you do really like each other but
on the other hand, you may have simply just got carried away with the attention,
so best to play it safe. Your guiding principles are mostly common sense but
abiding by them will enable you to have a much more successful outcome in the
dating arena.
Image:© Raycan | Dreamstime.com
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