It’s a sad state of affairs that in this day and age, we have to worry about the safety aspect of meeting potential romantic partners for the first time but, it is certainly wise to take all necessary precautions when meeting someone through Internet dating. Generally, Internet dating is fairly safe because initially it is getting to know someone from a distance and this can make you feel safe and quite comfortable. This safety from a distance also affords you the opportunity of taking your time before meeting them and trying to get to know whether they are suitable for you through careful selection.
At some point however you are going to take the plunge and want to get to know them face to face. Realistically, until you have actually met them in the flesh, you are not really going to be able to start knowing if they are right for you or whether you have any concerns. Sometimes people feel that Internet dating is not safe but it’s no more dangerous than meeting someone for the first time at a social function and for them to walk you to your car or even home at night.
There is lots that you can do however to stay safe and play safe. Firstly, do not give out your address or arrange to have your date come to your house. You really don’t know if they are going to be welcome another time so don’t make it awkward to get rid of them if their attentions are unwanted.
When you do meet, meet somewhere where there are lots of people and you can feel safety in numbers, even if you don’t know them. In a crowd, there is less chance of anything bad happening. You can give out your mobile number in case either of you get held up en-route but don’t give out your home or works number. Limit the contact to one email address and one phone number and this reduces any opportunity for them to infiltrate your life if you don’t want them too.
Remember that it’s easy to lie online and whilst most don’t, you could be unlucky and strike up an acquaintance with a serial liar. Take everything they say with a pinch of salt if you have reservations and determine whether they seem genuine when you meet up. If you have been sensible, you will have used your webcam prior to meeting so that you get a feel for how they seem at that point. Nerve-wracking yes, but it can make a big difference as to whether you end up meeting them or not. Always trust your instincts though and never make excuses for them or allowances. If your gut feeling is clanging warning bells, cancel the date or make an excuse to leave if they have already turned up.
You could meet up for a lunch date the first time if you prefer. An hour is just long enough to know whether you enjoy their company but not too long that you are bored. You will have formed a first impression and stand by that as to whether you meet up again.
Don’t offer a lift to your date or accept one the first time that you meet. Make sure that you have already arranged transport back home so that you can make a polite excuse. Avoid being on your own with them in quiet lonely streets as well, once you build up trust in your date, then you can allow your instinct to guide you, until then play safe.
If this all sounds so over the top and far too cautious, just remember that you never know anyone until you have met them a few times and really got to know them in all sorts of situations. People sometimes react seemingly out of character and you have to realise that a virtual friendship enables the most devious of people to hide behind romantic flirtations. Having said that, Internet dating is a fantastic way to meet people and you can have a lot of fun but remember that there are many dishonest people out there and more than a few of those could be using Internet dating. Don’t get conned, don’t get hurt and play it safe.
Image:© Nicole Weiss | Dreamstime.com
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